Heroes for Ghosts

July 25th, 2008 § 0 comments

I admit it, I forgot your birthday, not suggesting, however, I would not have anyway. Lately dreams have been a tangled mass of confusion, I thought it was an overdose of drug related moves, most recently Fear and Loathing; I am sure you would approve. But you being wrapped up in the mix is not so ordinary, I dream mostly of ghostly places not people.

How many birthdays was I there for, I wonder, it is a pity I don’t remember them. I remember one in 1999 or so. I have a visual picture of your card, fancy black lettering of your name covering a yellow envelope. You were impressed and I was surprised. I was glad you noticed, but I think I gave you an ugly card, something designed to annoy, perhaps a palm tree. I remember that look we would exchange that went through the solid barriers of people. It’s an inconvenience I don’t remember more, instead I remember the kinds of things I would rather forget. Last night I found there really is no way to think about you that is not painful.

You will age with us, what would it be, 29? You will always haunt us with your youth, because in our minds you never will age. I suppose we carry you on the only way we know how, forcing our memory of you to care about the things we still care about, getting older, celebrating our own existence. So, without doodles or cards or looks between friends, happy birthday.

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